eating fruit with wax on it (or anything...)

“people are stupid and eat fruit with wax on it.”

that’s something one of my humans has said, more than once. the first time, i thought i misunderstood him. the second time, i thought his vocabulary was broken. then, the day everyone got dressed up in “we-ding clothes” there was another human here – a really great one i was hoping would stay – named “aye-run” and he said it several more times.

“people are stupid and eat fruit with wax on it.” i love to run at the dog park, so i knew when i met aye-run, i’d like him.

when everyone was at the “we-ding” i rubbed the apples against some of the candles they forgot here, and it was true: the humans ate all the apples with the wax on it. (my little human girl, eee-lye-zah, ate most of them. blech!!!) humans really do. but what did it mean?

so then i got to wondering if i eat dog food with wax on it.

and while i was sniffing around, and i realized the answer. (answer: god only knows, with this stuff) i think i realized what my human and aye-run were getting at…

we eat all kinds of stuff, whether we understand it or not.

it reminds me of my “puppy-poo” period. back when i was a puppy, i used to eat… well, never mind. it’s kind of embarrassing now, like the infamous “bathtub photos” for human children, and the “bathtub photos” for cats from adulthood.

anyway, so it makes more sense to me now, this sentiment, “people are stupid and eat fruit with wax on it.” eating stupid things (and being embarrassed) makes sense.

and so since the “we-ding clothes” day, i’ve noticed lots of moments of “people are stupid and eat fruit with wax on it.”

something called “car insurance,” for example. my human said, “oh look what the rates did!” and said it again.

we were driving to the dog park and the car was thirsty, and he said it again.

i was at work with my human (i sit behind him so he can concentrate) and he worked at his computer, saying this over and over (it sounded really tiring). i think he sells “web clicks” to fruit trees.

and so, as far as i can tell, i’m only beginning to understand what this means, “people are stupid and eat fruit with wax on it.” it’s kind of mysterious, and kind of wholesome. it makes me glad to have my humans, and learn more about it. sort of like watching battlestar galactica and realizing that cylons evolved from shelties, even when the characters don’t see that coming.

i’ve decided that if i can help humans (all of them) with anything, it might be to help them not eat the fruit that has wax on it. i played with the settings on this blog; i might create a “don’t eat fruit with wax on it !!!” page, but i don’t see how yet. if you want to join the cause, email me. i’m just a dog in denver, but this seems important. i'd bank on the internet over fruit.

ciao for now,

vidi